1-800-732-5430 | Atlanta, GA
Carry the Message:
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By Jessica Brothers, LPC
Director of Women’s Recovery Center

“I just want you to know that my sister is a good person. Growing up, she was very active, people always liked being around her, she was beautiful, and she was so smart. While I had to study pretty hard to make the grades that I did, she could do well, even without the same effort. We were raised in church, and our parents mostly treated us the same. My sister is also an addict.” This is part of many stories I hear from families that bring their mothers, daughters, sisters, and loved ones to treatment.

sistersOne of the things families often stress to me is, “this is a good person.” Society makes it easy to assume that alcoholics and drug addicts are bad people. Easy, that is, until it happens to you and your family. You start to realize that there is more to addiction than the stereotype. It isn’t that those who struggle with addiction are bad – it is that the good person underneath the addiction is struggling to be seen.

Why am I saying this? Why does it matter? Because we love them. So, while you might think, “I didn’t sign up for this, “ you will often fight for them because you love them. You want them back, free of all the chaos addiction creates, because you love and care for them, and want a relationship with them.

Relationships matter because people are created to connect with one another. In fact, the argument could be made that being in relationships is one of life’s primary goals. How does this happen, though? As we develop, we go through a process of child-like dependence on mom and dad, to being an adult that is fully capable of being independent. The goal is for an individual to become self-sufficient, differentiated, and autonomous before being able to search for intimacy with someone else. Ultimately, being in relationships matter to the maturation process.

In the journey to addiction, an individual’s life becomes more and more about the substance they are using, and the behaviors of getting that substance. Because women are more likely to be motivated by connection, they often use alcohol or drugs to make or keep connections. As people, whether men or women, begin to use more and more, becoming dependent on the substance to feel like they can still function, their lives actually begin to constrict around them. Their world narrows until the only relationship they care about is with their substance. By the time they have reached “the bottom”, most individuals verbalize that they don’t even recognize themselves anymore – thereby losing that final relationship with one’s self.

Addiction treatment helps individuals begin to recognize not just how narrow their world has become, but to identify ways to connect with themselves and others again, and “the good person” in them begins to come out. This connection between physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual processes of recovery from their substance allows the person’s life to expand again.


Carry the Message:
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7 Comments

  • andrea tiffany says:

    I was at Marr from 1995 through 1997. I had been in treatment four times previously to my time at Marr. I chose to stay in a 3/4 quarter house and later independent living all made possible at Marr. I highly recommend it for anyone seeking help. It is the closest you can get to staying sober in the real world. The support you learn to accept from your community will be the same support you’ll need for sobriety after Marr.I did have a brief relapse in 2001 but have been clean since 4/2001. A miracle and one i give many thanks to Marr for.
    Affectionately, Andrea Tiffany
    P.S. My 79 year old mother is here with me and she said the Alumni picnic yearly at the lake was one of the greatest days of her life..

    • Anonymous says:

      Where is this place? We have been unable to get help for my granddaughter. The court system won’t even hhelp!

      • MARR says:

        Hi, we are located in Atlanta, Georgia. Please feel free to call us at 678.805.5100. We can help you by giving you a free assessment. If we are not a perfect fit, we can help you find a facility that fits your granddaughter’s needs.

        • Barbara Emberson says:

          My graND daughter is an addict and is currently in prison. When she comes out, is there a facility in the Wichita, KS area like MARR? She has been through treatment once and lived for 2 weeks in an Oxford House before using again and getting immediately kicked out.

          • MARR says:

            Barbara, there are only a handful of programs in the country that are similar to MARR, and none that we know of in Kansas. Please call 678.805.5100; we will give you a free assessment, and would love to talk to you further about your granddaughter’s recovery.

  • Mark Norris says:

    This is Mark Norris, I have been struggling with addiction since I was in my teens and I got hurt at work in 2006 and not able to work and on disability and my life has went really bad I’ve overdosed more times that you can count on both hands and died I left my wife and been in jail and prison for the past two years and got out Feb.18 and the 24 my kidneys shut down stage 5 kidney disease, I got thought that in a few months my kidneys came back and I’ve relapsed a couple of times, if I don’t get help I’m going to die.I’ve tried to get into a long term rehab and I am still not getting in ,I got a sponsor going to meetings everyday, I don’t know what else to do please help.

    • MARR says:

      Hello Mark, please feel free to call us at 678.805.5100 for a free assessment, where we can help you get into treatment. If our center is not the best option for you, we will refer you to another treatment center.

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